Posted in culture, humour, Mummy's health and wellness, pregnancy, Uncategorized

How I feel being 7 months pregnant

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So this is how I have been feeling lately. And I really hate the fact that the people around you doesn’t seem to be bothered. To my surprise, those women who experienced the exact same situation says, ” oh! Pregnancy… I used to do this I used to be really active.” I mean hello !!!! What do you mean to say all this rubbish in front of a woman who can barely walk or stand due to pregnancy pelvic girdle pain.

I am not mean. In fact,  I’m very generous and kind to the people. But these days I just hate unwanted guests. Why ….. WhY do I have to get up and sit down in front of them after running around my toddler all day long. Then I have to ask for tea and food.. Not for just one day … its bloody every other day. I’m exhausted man !!! Out of breath.

Don’t ask about sleep. The moment I’m in deep sleep my toddler wakes me up. Then I have to go wee. Then I feel thirsty.  Then I can’t turn to other side and stuck. Then I have a leg cramp.  Then my baby decide to get in some weird kind of position that hurt like hell.

Husband ..  feels like I should go somewhere and bang my head to the wall… He is acting like an ar*e. Excuse me ! You are suppose to ask me if I need anything or if I’m feeling alright. Instead of watching stupid scary movies and playing stupid games on you phone. It’s your kid as well . Why is it just me waddling around ??

And the aunty who says.. dear I hope Allah will definitely give you a son this time. Thank you so much !! First of all you are a woman. So be proud of yourself. My first daughter means the world to me. I am ready to have anything  and im not bothered about gender. My kids will be my kids whether they all are girls or boys. For your kind information. I have not found out the gender this time as well.

Rant over !!!!

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Posted in humour, life skills, mummy baby love, Mummy's health and wellness, self development and motivation, Uncategorized

Me time – the moment I can’t keep my eyes open but still scrolling down.

After a long day, shopping, cooking, feeding, changing, nursing or what not. My little girl gone to sleep. I can’t keep my eyes open and need to change to my pajamas, brush my teeth and drink some water.  But here I am, scrolling down my phone. Being nosy on instagram.

It’s been 10 months now. I have been doing this. Not same thing all the time but this me time is a very special time for my sanity. I don’t want to get up from bed and just want to sleep like the way I am. But what is this telling me to get up and wash my face and brush my teeth and change??

Sometime i think what a great life babies have. They fed, changed, sleep and entertained. When I put my daughter to sleep, she takes good 30 minutes to drift off. If I am offered by this opportunity I will grab it in a second.  Now, I just closed my eyes and went in my dream seeing the stupidest things one can imagine.  Time to get up…

If you are in the same boat tell me what do you do in your “me time”.

 

 

Posted in life skills, mummy baby love, Mummy's health and wellness, self development and motivation, Uncategorized

What I learned being a first time mum

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  1. To be very alert in sleep.
  2. Putting my little girl first in everything.
  3. The value of routine in life.
  4. Making different types of baby food.
  5. No procrastination.
  6. Clean on the go.
  7. No late night gatherings
  8. Staying in a budget.
  9. Pinning every single blog post about parenting.
  10. 101 ways to entertain my daughter.
  11. Singing nursery rhymes.
  12. Home remedies to cure any illness.
  13. Controlling my anger.
  14. No matter how much I disagree with any other mother’s parenting, I just keep my mouth shut for her respect.
  15. Loving unconditionally.
  16. Understanding the fact that I’m not perfect.
  17. Learning  with every mistake.
  18. To know what my baby needs by her each cry.
  19. Praying for her before I pray for myself.
  20. Laughing and giggling with her even when I am sad.
  21. Getting happy to buy her clothes and shoes before I buy anything for myself.
  22. Learned the fact that Allah loves us more than 70 mothers. I know how much I love her. What would be the level of that love he has for us.
Posted in baby health and wellness, development and learning for baby, Mummy's health and wellness

Growth spurt and sleep regression

 

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I am a first time mum of a baby girl, who’s 6 months. Those early days of newborn are gone and we started getting hang over everything. Things went so smooth that I decided to write a blog about my motherhood and my baby. My baby weaned well, have a routine of morning and daytime naps, sleeping 7 hours straight at night. Felt like I achieved what I wanted and going up one more level. And now boom.  Sudden change in sleep pattern and naps. Now I feel like a mombie.

When to expect growth spurt

Well motherhood is unpredictable and the joys of accomplishment didn’t last long. You must heard about ‘ growth spurt ‘. 6 weeks, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months and so on. I think she is having one.

All babies are different and their growth spurts are different as well. These are just estimate age where people observed their babies growing.  In fact, babies grow over night. Their growth spurt last for 3 days or a week.

She decided to teach me a lesson now. So on this stage this madam doesn’t like to sleep during day at all. Before I was just put her and she usually sleep for an hour two times a day on her own. Now she need feeding and rocking and patting and even after all that she wakes up after 15 minutes. On top of that she wants me to hold her all the time. All

Night time is the worst. After giving me those wonderful sleeps she started waking up every other hour . And now she doesn’t want to go back in her cot after feed. Yes. We are breastfeeding but we are not Co sleeping.

Other mums at baby group was having discussion about baby routines.  When I told them about my girl they were just amazed of how I done it. I became so confident. But now I am thinking what I’m doing wrong. Where I went wrong. Am I being overconfident.

My health visitor explained about growth spurt. What to look for? What to do? What are her needs right now? How to cope when baby is having a growth spurt.

Signs that your baby going through growth spurt

1. Feeding or eating more than usual

2. Sleeping regression  or hibernation.

3. When their clothes go smaller.

4. When they are fussier and need more comfort and cuddles.

5. There will be sudden increase in their weight and height.

Do’s and don’t

1. Do feed your baby whenever she wants. But don’t overfeed them when they start leaving or pushing out then stop.

2. Don’t link everything to growth spurt. It doesn’t accompany fever or rashes or any other illness. Always consult your pediatrician when you observe anything of concern.

3. Babies don’t understand their emotions and body changes and they get fussier. Feed them change them and check if their tummies are ok. Give them lots of cuddles and make them feel secure.

4. Do not wake your child up to feed. Unless your breasts are full and you have no option. Let them sleep. The more they sleep they grow.

5. Be there for your baby. Housework can be done once they are sleeping.

6. If they don’t let you sleep at night and keep waking up for feed, just feed them and keep patience. These days will pass soon.

Finally, I want to give support to all of you and tell you this is just a phase. I know it feels rrally frustrating sometimes and feels like you are stuck in this endless cycle but trust me when you look at your baby growing, you will forget about everything. One more thing that I was doing wrong.  I got too stuck up on making routine and staying on it. It’s not bad to follow your routine but if baby slips off then just allow it and stop blaming yourself.  Enjoy every stage.

Have a nice growth spurt.

Posted in baby health and wellness, development and learning for baby, Mummy's health and wellness

Sleep training success

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Babies are not meant to act like clock work. Neither, they can follow a book. Every baby is different and the way they develop day by day also tend to be different. Some babies are good sleeper naturally but few of them give hard time to their parents. The only thing a parent can do is to establish a routine as soon  as they can.

At the beginning, when baby is born we can’t follow any routine. That time the only important thing is to be there for her and give her what she needs. They sleep a lot in their early days. But they don’t have any pattern of sleep. They sleep any time and they get up anytime.

When can you start establishing routine

When baby reaches their 6 weeks they will go through growth spurt as well. At that time a mother should try to look for the cues and start putting them to sleep on particular times. If they don’t sleep don’t get frustrated. Just try to follow similar routine everyday before their night sleep and daytime naps. Put them to sleep during daytime naps and night time on the similar times. Babies will eventually learn to follow the timing by watching their surroundings. Keep the lights as dim as you can and keep it quiet at night so they know it’s night and they should sleep quietly. When putting them to sleep during day do not try to keep it as quiet. You don’t have to tip toe as you won’t be able to do anything if you worry about them to sleep long. They need to learn the difference during day and night. When they grow older their daytime naps will go shorter.

When my girl reached her six weeks, I started following routine before her night sleep of bathing, massaging, changing of pyjamas, low lights and feed. She was and still breastfeeding and she usually dozed off after her feed.  Initially it was a struggle because the time I wanted her to sleep was not the time for her feed. So she didn’t know how to put herself to sleep at that stage. Then after a week, she started waking up just after 20 minutes of her sleep. Like I used to start her routine at 9pm and by the time I feed her she used to go to sleep by 10. And then she wake up a lot at 12 then 2 then 5. Because she was exclusively breastfeeding. So you have to be lenient but consistent at that stage. 

By the time she reached her 3 months everything went out of the window. I was searching and reading a lot about what I was doing wrong. But couldn’t find anything.

When she was 4 months, I found out about sleep training.  There were two methods.

  1. Cry it out
  2. No tears (pick up put down)

I read and read and read. There was not a single thing I liked about cry it out. The first method ‘cry it out’ is that you leave your kid in her cot or moses basket after nappy change and feed. And leave the room. The baby will cry but you can’t come until 5 minutes. After 5 minutes you come in room and check if they are ok. If they still cry you let them cry. And next time you come after 10 minutes. Baby will cry and then learn to sleep . Which  doesn’t make any sense to me.  May be it work for few people but I just can’t see my baby crying and coughing. So I just ignored the idea of cry it out.

Then I read about no tears. I completely swear by it.

Pick up put down

Well this worked for me wonders. I’m going to tell you about it in detail. But just keep that in mind. You have to be consistent and do not compromise at the beginning. No matter you have a night out with your husband or anything in the world. It’s better to have good night tine with hubby everyday rather than once a week. If you want you baby to learn the skill for the rest of their life and some peace for your sleeps, be there for them and start.

What you got to do is after their night time routine. Do not let them sleep after their feed. Well I’m not saying always but just when you are starting your sleep training. If they sleep just try to rub their ear or cheeks or open one leg of the babygrow . Consider that you don’t need to fully wake them up. You need to put them down in their basket when they are sleepy not asleep.

After few seconds they are going to start crying. Don’t let them cry . Pick them up and calm them down. When they stop crying you need to put them down. They will start crying again. Pick them up again and continue doing it till they go to sleep.

First attempts could be failure but for me she learned to sleep on third day. It was so amazing. I stopped all that rocking and moving. And my daughter was sleeping on her own. On the fourth day, I didn’t even need to pick her up. I just patted her on her chest.

She is 6 months now and most of the time she sleep straight after breastfeed. I don’t wake her up if she is in deep sleep. But if she don’t sleep during feed, I use the same method. Now she sleep through the night 10pm to 8am and have 3 regular daytime naps.

The good thing about this method is that you can use the same technique during daytime naps.  But I must say determination, patience and consistency is the key.

Posted in baby health and wellness, Mummy's health and wellness

Things you need to know about breastfeeding as a first time mum

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1. First time breastfeeding

First 3 days. Oh my goodness! Before birth I thought I’m going to exclusively breastfeed my baby. Well I did but I was thinking I’m not going to give even single drop of formula milk. Baby’s stomach increases in days. I thought I will be having enough milk. On my second day postpartum, I was feeding my girl for 1 hour and then 2 hours but she was crying and crying and crying. I was at my wits end  and at the end of day I started crying as well. Thoughts like I’m not a good mum or I’m not providing enough for my baby keep bombarding my mind. I gave her one ounce formula and there you go. She got settled. Looking around. And then she slept for 3 hours.

I kept breastfeeding her during all day. On the third day, she slept for 4 hours and my supply was at its peak. I remember I was trying to wake her up so I feed her. Because it was leaking.

2. Managing milk supply

As a first time mum, you have to feed with both breast for a constant time. Well it’s a common sense but I was myself use to forget which side I fed her. Ending up one side heavier than other.

Newborn babies take long to feed but as they grow older, feeding time tends to get shorter. I downloaded an app for breastfeeding. It was so good . It indicated each side and how long and how many times baby has been fed.

If your baby sleep longer after one breast. Try using pump for the other side only when you feel it’s too full and your baby is not waking up. To my own experience I don’t like using pump. But there are times you don’t have any option . You have to take it out.

Now I don’t use any app or pump.  My baby has started weaning and she feeds for shorter time and not very frequently.  And now I learnt and knew how to manage.

3. Blocked ducts or hardened milk

This is a killer. I had it 3 times now. So painful and frustrating.  It happens when you don’t feed or express milk for long period. And you have full milk. Hard lumps formed in your breast that won’t go even after you feed your baby.

I still remember one night when it happened to me first time . I literally woke up from my sleep. I saw there was a milk blister on my nipple and 3 lumps in my breast.  I went into hot shower to bring it down, I expressed, I fed nothing helped.

I searched and searched and found milk blisters can be treated by sterilised needle if you just burst the blister and feed. Well I know so many of you will disagree . But it worked for me. But I am going to get checked from my gp as well.

I observed it happens more after I started weaning my girl.  Always tell your gp about anything that need to be concerned.

Sometimes even if your baby bump his head on your chest or by mistake it got hit by anything that can cause lumps and pain in breast as well. So be careful.

4. Increasing supply

I’m a pakistani, so my mum always bombard me with so many baby hacks and tips. Supply always depends on the demand. Usually, your body will produce the amount your baby needs. But there are ways to increasing supply as well.

My mum told me to drink water boiled with fennel seeds. It helps increasing the milk supply and will also be good on baby stomach.

The other thing she told me was eating fish increase milk supply as well. And it truly does.

In first few months,baby wakes a lot during night for feed. My mum used to give milk before bed. Now I always have a glass of milk before sleeping. It helps with milk supply during night time.

5. Quality of milk

It all depend on your diet. I really really want to tell most the new mums to please look after your diet. Your baby is what you eat. Babies tummies are so sensitive in early days. So as your body.  So eat clean diet at the beginning. Avoid spices or heavy junk food. Drink plenty of water. Do not drink cold juice or drinks. Limit your caffeine. Eat lots of nuts. Our asian mummies always make ‘panjeeri ‘ for new mummy. This is the whole blend of nuts, seeds, dry fruits roasted in clarified butter. It is so good for milk and it gives so much energy to mum. It helps soothe and recover the postpartum body as well.

 6. Proper latch

It’s very important. Milk doesn’t flow properly causing hardening and making lumps in breast if baby is not properly latched. The nipple should by fully in mouth and make sure the baby is breathing fine.

7. Breastfeeding positions

Always make yourself comfortable while feeding. Invest in good nursing pillows. I swear by the one I have. It’s c shaped. Do not lean on your baby while feeding. It gives you so much back pain. If baby is fussy try changing the positions.

 

 

Posted in baby health and wellness, Mummy's health and wellness

Breastfeeding to sleep and soothe baby

Screenshot_2016-03-17-12-44-23-1Babies are born with the instinct of sucking the breast . After birth the minute you put baby skin to skin, she starts feeding. It’s normal and it’s natural. If comfort nursing works for you and your family than nothing else matters at all.  When your baby grows few months older, people will start telling you to stop using feed as an association to sleep. Your kid needs to learn how to put himself to sleep on his own.

According to a research, sucking on breast releases a hormone called cholecystokinin (CCK) which makes both baby and mummy feeling relaxed and brings baby in sleep mode (Uvnas-Muberg et. Al 1993).

It’s important to teach your children good habits but it’s perfectly normal and healthy if your baby drift off on breast. It’s one of the developmental stage.

Babies usually wake up 2 to 3 times at night during their first year.  Some babies are just different they sleep through the night. There are no right or wrong rules or any successful methods.  Few things works for few babies and those same things won’t work on other babies. As time passes you will learn yourself what is more comforting for your baby.

My baby girl is about 6 months now and I trained her for sleeping as well. But she still drops off to sleep while feeding. I will write a post about how I trained her to sleep on her own. But for now I just want all the mothers to know to give your baby comfort. They feel close to you and they relax . Just think about it this way. Time flies when you have a baby and they wont be able to get the comfort and nourishment through breastfeed in their later life. So make the most of it and dont feel guilty . Even we as adults have associations to sleep like watching TV, reading book , scrolling through our smartphones and tablets.

Trust your baby and yourself.  There will be a time when your baby will go to sleep on his own. And then you will miss the closeness you had before. Just make the most of it.

I used to google a lot and i read a lot of articles about how to put baby to sleep , how to get them sleep through night, is comfort nursing good or bad. And all the mothers have these concerns. I can truly relate with that. But I learnt if that time someone came to me and reassure that this time is very little. My baby sleep through by God’s blessing .  She still wakes up once at night. But after a feed she goes back to sleep. It’s a natural developmental progression that she learnt when she was ready. And your baby will learn it too. Do not get frustrated and trust yor instinct. You are the mother and you are the whole world for your baby right now.  So be there for her .